{"id":571,"date":"2014-05-19T07:40:03","date_gmt":"2014-05-19T05:40:03","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/stupideetcontagieux.net\/?p=571"},"modified":"2014-05-19T07:42:06","modified_gmt":"2014-05-19T05:42:06","slug":"pat-seb","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/stupideetcontagieux.net\/?p=571","title":{"rendered":"Pat &#038; S\u00e9b"},"content":{"rendered":"<div style=\"padding-bottom:20px; padding-top:10px;\" class=\"hupso-share-buttons\"><!-- Hupso Share Buttons - http:\/\/www.hupso.com\/share\/ --><a class=\"hupso_toolbar\" href=\"http:\/\/www.hupso.com\/share\/\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/static.hupso.com\/share\/buttons\/dot.png\" style=\"border:0px; padding-top:5px; float:left;\" alt=\"Share Button\"\/><\/a><script type=\"text\/javascript\">var hupso_services_t=new Array(\"Twitter\",\"Facebook\",\"Google Plus\",\"Pinterest\",\"Tumblr\",\"VKontakte\",\"Email\",\"Print\");var hupso_background_t=\"#EAF4FF\";var hupso_border_t=\"#66CCFF\";var hupso_toolbar_size_t=\"big\";var hupso_twitter_via = \"BenHowl1\";var hupso_image_folder_url = \"\";var hupso_twitter_via=\"BenHowl1\";var hupso_url_t=\"\";var hupso_title_t=\"Pat &amp; S\u00e9b\";<\/script><script type=\"text\/javascript\" src=\"https:\/\/static.hupso.com\/share\/js\/share_toolbar.js\"><\/script><!-- Hupso Share Buttons --><\/div><p>Pat et S\u00e9b, c&rsquo;est des poissons.<\/p>\n<p>Le diminutif de Patrick et S\u00e9bastien &#8211; pour celles et ceux qui n&rsquo;auraient pas reconnu la <a title=\"Page wikip\u00e9dia de Patrick S\u00e9bastien\" href=\"http:\/\/fr.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Patrick_S%C3%A9bastien\" target=\"_blank\">r\u00e9f\u00e9rence<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>Pat et S\u00e9b, c&rsquo;est mes poissons.<\/p>\n<p>C&rsquo;est pas des <a title=\"Patrick Sebastien - Les Sardines\" href=\"http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=PA3P1-aSvKQ\" target=\"_blank\">sardines<\/a>, c&rsquo;est des <a title=\"Page wikip\u00e9dia de Black Moor (en anglais)\" href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Black_Moor\" target=\"_blank\">Black moor<\/a>.<br \/>\nC&rsquo;est eux qui, du fond de leur bocal, font fuir les <a title=\"Diya\" href=\"https:\/\/stupideetcontagieux.net\/?p=75\" target=\"_blank\">pigeons de passage<\/a> \u2013 Marcelline et Diya, et leurs b\u00e9b\u00e9s\u00a0; Jules et Verne, Marco et Polo, et <a title=\"Le Survivant\" href=\"https:\/\/stupideetcontagieux.net\/?p=266\" target=\"_blank\">Ken<\/a>, \u00e9videmment\u2026<br \/>\nPat et S\u00e9b, c&rsquo;est mes poissons.<br \/>\nC&rsquo;est stupide, des poissons.<\/p>\n<p>C&rsquo;est contagieux.<br \/>\nPat et S\u00e9b, je les ai eu en cadeau pour mon anniversaire.<br \/>\nDu fond de leur bocal, quand ils ont barbot\u00e9 dedans pour la toute premi\u00e8re fois, ils ont pas d\u00fb capter. Baptis\u00e9s civilement Pat et S\u00e9b, OK, mais disposer en sus d&rsquo;autres pr\u00e9noms officieux et secrets, \u00e7a, c&rsquo;est peut-\u00eatre compliqu\u00e9 pour leur micro-cerveau mouill\u00e9 et leur carcasse schizo\u00efde.<br \/>\nDu fond de leur bocal, quand ils ont barbot\u00e9 pour la toute premi\u00e8re fois, ils m&rsquo;ont vu pleurer \u2013 int\u00e9rieurement du moins. J&rsquo;allais quand m\u00eame pas me mettre \u00e0 chialer comme une gonzesse devant mes invit\u00e9s pour deux poissons tout riquiqui.<br \/>\nL\u00e0, ils ont d\u00fb se dire qu&rsquo;enfin, j&rsquo;allais devenir responsable \u2013 qu&rsquo;enfin, j&rsquo;avais quelqu&rsquo;un dont je devrais m&rsquo;occuper.<br \/>\nChanger l&rsquo;eau du bocal tous les cinq jours \u2013 quand elle commence \u00e0 \u00eatre trouble et d\u00e9gueulasse.<br \/>\nLeur verser \u00e0 manger tous les matins \u00e0 l&rsquo;heure du petit d\u00e9j&rsquo; &#8211;<br \/>\nParce que c&rsquo;est tout un art de s&rsquo;occuper de ces petits montres difformes aux yeux globuleux et \u00e0 la t\u00eate de con\u2026<br \/>\nL\u00e0, ils ont d\u00fb se dire que j&rsquo;allais faire attention \u00e0 eux, que j&rsquo;allais \u00eatre doux et conciliant, les bercer tous les soirs par ma voix de soprane et les doux sons de mon ukul\u00e9l\u00e9.<br \/>\nL\u00e0, ils ont aussi d\u00fb se dire que \u00e7a y est, j&rsquo;allais arr\u00eater de me casser tout le temps, tous les week-ends, en voyage, en vadrouille, bourlinguer, partir toujours plus en avant, me perdre dans des contr\u00e9es lointaines, dans l&rsquo;immensit\u00e9 des villes, dans les champs de France et d&rsquo;ailleurs.<\/p>\n<p>Non. On a beau \u00e9voluer, encore, toujours, par petites touches \u2013 il y a des choses qui changeront jamais.<\/p>\n<figure id=\"attachment_573\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-573\" style=\"width: 625px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><a href=\"https:\/\/stupideetcontagieux.net\/WordPress3\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/05\/poissons.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-large wp-image-573\" src=\"https:\/\/stupideetcontagieux.net\/WordPress3\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/05\/poissons-768x1024.jpg\" alt=\"dans le bocal\" width=\"625\" height=\"833\" srcset=\"https:\/\/stupideetcontagieux.net\/WordPress3\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/05\/poissons-768x1024.jpg 768w, https:\/\/stupideetcontagieux.net\/WordPress3\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/05\/poissons-225x300.jpg 225w, https:\/\/stupideetcontagieux.net\/WordPress3\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/05\/poissons-624x832.jpg 624w, https:\/\/stupideetcontagieux.net\/WordPress3\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/05\/poissons-900x1200.jpg 900w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 625px) 100vw, 625px\" \/><\/a><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-573\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">photo vol\u00e9e de Pat et S\u00e9b<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<div style=\"padding-bottom:20px; padding-top:10px;\" class=\"hupso-share-buttons\"><!-- Hupso Share Buttons - http:\/\/www.hupso.com\/share\/ --><a class=\"hupso_toolbar\" href=\"http:\/\/www.hupso.com\/share\/\"><img src=\"https:\/\/static.hupso.com\/share\/buttons\/dot.png\" style=\"border:0px; padding-top:5px; float:left;\" alt=\"Share Button\"\/><\/a><script type=\"text\/javascript\">var hupso_services_t=new Array(\"Twitter\",\"Facebook\",\"Google Plus\",\"Pinterest\",\"Tumblr\",\"VKontakte\",\"Email\",\"Print\");var hupso_background_t=\"#EAF4FF\";var hupso_border_t=\"#66CCFF\";var hupso_toolbar_size_t=\"big\";var hupso_twitter_via = \"BenHowl1\";var hupso_image_folder_url = \"\";var hupso_twitter_via=\"BenHowl1\";var hupso_url_t=\"\";var hupso_title_t=\"Pat &amp; S\u00e9b\";<\/script><script type=\"text\/javascript\" src=\"https:\/\/static.hupso.com\/share\/js\/share_toolbar.js\"><\/script><!-- Hupso Share Buttons --><\/div><p>Pat et S\u00e9b, c&rsquo;est des poissons. Le diminutif de Patrick et S\u00e9bastien &#8211; pour celles et ceux qui n&rsquo;auraient pas reconnu la r\u00e9f\u00e9rence. Pat et S\u00e9b, c&rsquo;est mes poissons. C&rsquo;est pas des sardines, c&rsquo;est des Black moor. C&rsquo;est eux qui, du fond de leur bocal, font fuir les pigeons de passage \u2013 Marcelline et Diya, [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[46,47,127,43,44,128,32,37],"class_list":["post-571","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-le-coin-de-ben-howl","tag-diya","tag-ken","tag-pat","tag-pigeons","tag-poissons","tag-seb","tag-ukulele","tag-voyages"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/stupideetcontagieux.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/571","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/stupideetcontagieux.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/stupideetcontagieux.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stupideetcontagieux.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stupideetcontagieux.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=571"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/stupideetcontagieux.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/571\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":574,"href":"https:\/\/stupideetcontagieux.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/571\/revisions\/574"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/stupideetcontagieux.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=571"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stupideetcontagieux.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=571"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stupideetcontagieux.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=571"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}